listen

I should listen to you.
I should let you go.
i Should at least try to get you out of my mind.
out of my nightmares.
i should have told you first.
i should have listened.
you did wrong. i did worse.
im a bad person and i know it.
i don't deserve what i have and i know it.
do you?
do you deserve everything you have?
have you earnt it?
have you tried to change yourself.
Things happen and they change us.
when i found out ive had depression for almost half of my life..
i didnt feel strong like the doctor told me.
she said i was strong enough to have lived with it for that long.
im not strong.
Ive tried to kill myself.
im not a strong person
im a horrible person.
im horrible and i know it.
and you know it too.

i dont know what to do
i want to be your friend
i want to start anew
but i know i shouldnt
because ill do something i regret
youll hurt me
just like everyone else has ever hurt me
anyone ive let into my life without caution.
why do you continue to haunt me
stalk me
make fun of me behind my back.
i dont understand.
you should listen to this
i know youve been watching my blog very closely.
please get the right message and nopt interpret what im saying wrongly.
please help me